Darkest Night
by IlovemyDeanBean
Summary: Do you think death is instantenous?


"Do you think death is instantaneous?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"I'm a nurse, and I don't know if it's painless"   
***********************  
I have given, I have given  
And got none  
***********************  
He kept walking out of the ER, listening to the voices yelling at him  
getting fainter and fainter.  
  
Everything was sounding quiet, the sound of the rushing traffic and   
the hum of the El dizzying him as Luka walked into the middle of the  
street, watching with almost closed eyes as the cars swirved and honked.  
  
He stood there, his eyes closed, feeling the metal whiz by.  
  
"Luka!" Abby called from across the street,"LUKA!"  
  
He opened his dark eyes, shadows making his eyes almost all the way  
black, his coat flickering around his knees.  
  
She hugged her chest,"Come back in Luka, please?"  
  
The cars whized by faster, his head rolling back. Hands on his head,  
Luka started walking out of the tangle of cards, and onto the El   
platform.  
  
Looking both ways, Abby dashed out in the middle of the cars.  
  
When they honked their horns, the wheels screeching, Luka looked over  
his shoulder.  
  
"L-Luka"  
************************  
Still I'm driven by something I can't explain  
It's not a cross, it is a choice  
I cannot help but hear his voice  
I only wish that I could listen without shame  
  
************************  
He sat down first, resting his face against the plastic of the seat.  
  
Abby sat across from him, folding and unfolding the hem of her jacket.  
She looked up at him from the corner of her eye, dodging her glance  
whenever he looked at her.  
  
"Were you scared?" His voice came out husky, like she was waiting for  
him to clear it before he finished talking to her."Were you scared   
for your life?".  
  
"Eric's missing" Abby answered clearly. She bit her lip hard,"I have  
other things to be scared about".  
  
Luka nodded, and closed his eyes again, resting against the seat one more  
time.  
  
A tear slipped down Abby's cheek before she had a chance to hide her  
face.  
*********************  
Let it rain  
Let it rain on me  
Let it rain, oh let it rain  
Let it rain on me  
  
*********************  
"Do you think you feel anything when your plane goes nose first, 200 miles  
per hour into water?"  
  
"How do you know he went nose-first?"  
  
"I don't"  
**********************  
I have been a witness to the perfect crime  
I wipe the grin off of my face to hide the blame  
**********************  
He walked three steps behind her in the grocery store. Sometimes she'd stall in  
the aisle, just to hear the shuffling of his feet stop. To feel that tall   
shadow over her shoulder.  
  
Her hand shook as she reached out of the tequila bottle. Luka turned his head away,  
studying through misty eyes at the marble grain in the tiles.  
  
"He's going to be mad if I do" she whispered.  
  
Clinching his jaw, Luka shrugged."You're a grown woman, Abby".  
  
She couldn't look at him as they marched through the store. Her cheeks  
burned, her hands shook, and all she could hear was the blood rushing  
through her veins.  
  
Talking the bags from her hands,Luka stepped in front of her, stepping  
out into the street, cars screeching, one in back of the other, the   
front car, an old man, who's face was scrunched up and burning red with  
anger, was honking.  
  
Luka turned around and smiled at Abby.  
****************************  
it isn't worth the tears you cry to have a perfect alibi  
Now I'm beaten at the hands of my own game  
  
  
****************************  
It sat in the middle of table. The phone right next to her head as she   
slept against the stack of business magazines that still came to  
the apartment with his name on the address label.  
  
She never really slept, kept her eyes closed so she wouldn't feel the  
sting of insomnia. Red, blood shot eyes with dark, bruise like circles  
under her eyes. The lines more proment in her hands, her fingernails   
yellowed from the increased amount of cigarettes she had started  
smoking again.  
  
Abby got up and yawned, brushing the cigarette ashes from her lap.  
She moved the old newspapers, groaned at the rings her coffee mugs  
had left in his IKEA table.Her eyes went up slowly, the smell without  
even opening the bottle filling her nose.  
  
Grabbing the neck of the tequila bottle violently, Abby sank down into  
the couch, moving Luka's feet without a thought. Tears raced down  
her cheeks."Oh god"  
  
He sat up slowly, and touched her knee.  
  
"What am I doing?" Abby looked at him, the lines from the pillow,the way  
he had held onto the blanket so tight it left imprint marks on his  
bare arms, his jacket thrown over one of her chairs.  
  
"Trying to forget" he made his way to the bathroom.  
  
She twisted the top off the bottle, looked down into what felt like  
a neverending eternity of alchol. The smell made her nauseous, but Abby  
just took another deep breath."I'm just trying to forget".  
**************************  
It isn't easy to be kind  
With all these demons in my mind  
I only hope one day I'll be free  
  
**************************  
"I was going to make some calls..try to figure out what they're doing  
to find him".  
  
"You don't need to".  
  
"It's the least I can do".  
  
"I just want to wait.."  
***************************  
I do my best not to complain  
My face is dirty from the strain  
I only hope one day I'll come clean  
  
***************************  
She stood on the edge of the ledge, her arms out at her sides.  
Everytime a wind blew, it swayed her body, and after awhile, she'd  
gotten almost comfortable with that panic, the inner scratching at   
the inside of her chest.  
  
Abby looked down at the street below. The cars racing back and forth.  
  
All she could hear in her head was his voice, yelling about how she'd  
let him down, how she'd betrayed him by buying the tequilla.She broke  
her promise to him.  
  
Each time Abby thought about him, her body swayed towards the pavement  
below.  
  
.."It's your mom" Luka held the phone to his chest,"Something about Eric".He  
walked over to her, helping her down, and sink into the corner of the roof.  
He sank down beside her, took her hand in his.  
  
"I know" she said quietly, swallowing hard so he wouldn't see her tears,  
"I know. That's what everyone keeps telling me, that it's going to be  
alright".  
  
She turned off the phone, crying in her hands.  
  
Luka wrapped his arms around her, kissing the top of her head."It's going  
to be alright, Abby." 


End file.
